Say goodnight, Dick.

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Closed a credit card account today, a meaningless gesture in light of the others and how much I owe, but still: yee-haw. The “retention specialist” tried a bit to keep me on, but I stuck to my guns and said good bye.

If you don’t remember these guys, and their closing line in the title, they were hosts of one of the funniest shows in TV history. And oddly, I’m sure, one of the stalest. Comedy, like really good bread, should be enjoyed the day it’s made. And we shouldn’t be at all sad if it gets moldy, that’s just fine. Waste is never a great thing, but I’m not going to cry because my bread DOESN’T have all the anti-this and preserve-that in it like a Twinky. We should embrace the limited shelf-life of a locally made bread.

Of course, credit cards on the other hand, should be shredded, set on fire, their ashes buried in manure, and shot into space. With gleeful cackles all the way.